Big Ben Gets Ticked-Off

Ben wore bushy sideburns and a day's growth of hair; Stephan wore small silver spectacles and an expensive hat; they both wore confused looks and they both stood upon the amplified centre of the amphitheater. Behind them, the river did its best to roll amidst the mud and twigs.
"I suppose you're wondering why I called you here," I said.
"Not really," said Ben. "You told us on the phone."
"Did I?"
"Yes."
"Oh. Sorry."
"We're wondering," began Stephan, "why you're dressed like a superhero."
"Are you?"
"Yes."
"Well isn't it obvious?"
"No," said Ben. "Not at all."
I looked down upon my beautifully tailored costume.
"It's quite nice, isn't it?" I said.
They shrugged.
"Anyway, I'll get down to business. Sorry."
There was a pause.
"Was that it?" asked Ben.
"Yes."
"Can we go now?"
"Yes — I'll join you."
I hopped down the stairs and joined my comrades.

We set off down the path near the river.
"Oh dear," said Stephan. "I think I just happened in my trousers."
"You mean..." I started.
"Yes, I'm feeling my lunch. I couldn't resist."
"No worries. We'll get you cleaned up in no time." And we did.