Catch-And-Go-Thief

You may have noticed my hands. Well, perhaps I'll get enough momentum to spin last year's world all the way around. I was told, you see, that if you pump up your hands to the point where they're almost blown up, you can reach across vast oceans and bridge people across. There'll be a toll, of course, but it's cheaper than the alternatives. And, as Freud pointed out, believing in a religion is one of the most extreme forms of neurosis, and thus more affordable.

You'll have to trust me on this. There are some people in a tree outside. One swinging, the other not. But that's like apples and oranges, if only in name. Still, penis envy does explain a lot about the female mind, and is enormously — if you'll pardon the pun — useful. And the fact that women never use progressive verbs means that they are ultimately down-trodden, but never down wind. Suspicious, yes; strange, no.

In other words, I've been too deep into the medicine cabinet. Mixed my news, views and sniffing-glues, and come off quite... Odd.